Breaking my own rule
Renegotiating with your boss when your boss is you + how we're cooking up the final ingredients for Third Nature Summer Camp
I’m pretty sure this is my first time sending this newsletter on any day other than a Monday. I’m usually pretty regimented with sending it every other week since January (and every week from Spring 2020 - December 2024).
But I got home Monday at around 4pm, after seeing two Phish shows in Saratoga (more on that at the bottom) over the weekend. It’s not that out of the ordinary for me to start writing the newsletter at 4pm on Monday, and get it out the door by 8pm. But after being away from Alexis and Drew for 48 hours, I just wanted to be with them.
So I looked at my calendar - Tuesday was jam packed with meetings, but I figured I could write and send the newsletter on Wednesday.
As a solopreneur / entrepreneur leading a small team, self-imposed deadlines are vital - we need to be our own bosses, making sure shit gets done when it needs to, to move our businesses forward.
If I’m too easy on myself as a boss, allowing myself to miss too many of those self-imposed deadlines (or not giving myself deadlines at all) I risk business failure…and needing to go get a boss who’s not me.
On the other hand, if I’m too hard on myself as a boss, never letting myself renegotiate a self-imposed deadline when life happens, I risk burnout and life failure.
And what’s the point of being your own boss if your work isn’t enabling the life you want to live?
To help me feel less guilty when renegotiating a deadline or guideline with myself, I always find at least one potential business benefit to the shift (in addition to the life benefit).
In this case, I get to experiment with seeing how open rate and engagement differs when sending the newsletter on a Wednesday as opposed to a Monday 🤓
So here we are. Happy Wednesday! Back to this week’s scheduled programming…
Third Nature Summer Camp is 1 month away!
I’ll be honest - a lot of the work behind the scenes of making Third Nature Summer Camp as magical / life changing as it is (participants’ words, not mine) happens right now - in the final month leading up to the weekend.
Yes, we’re working on camp year round.
The leadership team, facilitators, workshops, and overall structure of the weekend is pretty set in April - a good 4 months in advance of camp.
But the theme and flow of the weekend, the through-lines, the arc, the participant journey…in 10 years of doing this, I’ve found that comes together most organically in the last month before camp.
Because by now, we’ve learned more about…
the people we’re bringing together
what’s present and alive for us individually and collectively
the cultural / societal context surrounding camp
This becomes clear through (among other things) what participants share on their applications and pre-camp questionnaires in response to the following questions.
Here are some of the many diverse examples of what people have shared:
Why would you like to participate in this experience?
“Recently entered my 30s, finished grad school, and moved back to NYC. In a deep phase of reflection about how I want to navigate this next chapter, and the types of relationships / friendships I want to cultivate. This experience seems like a great way to do that along side others who are in similar life phases, and also enjoy the outdoors :)”
“As a person who deeply values connection to self and others, I know that intentionally designed experiences have the power to be transformational. Reading through the website, I definitely resonate with the values of who this camp is for. A theme of mine over the past year has been reconnecting with my inner child and the healing power of play in our adult lives. I think this camp checks off all the boxes for me!”
“As a self-proclaimed overachiever, I’m always chasing the next “big” thing. But lately this pattern hasn’t been serving me. Year after year, I land the dream role or job and in due time it stops satiating my intellectual curiosity. Instead, it leaves me feeling burnt out, at a loss for purpose, and itching for a change. I’m hoping Third Nature can help me gain clarity on what it is I’m really chasing and how I can navigate my path there more intentionally.
What do you hope to get out of this weekend?
“Fun, self-learning, relaxation, and new friends”
“genuine connections, deep and fascinating conversations, time in nature without technology”
“A nice reset, make some great friends that inspire me to live more intentionally, and hopefully some good habits to bring back to my new life/home”
“Looking to sharpen my intuition; connect with like-minded folks; and generally feel restored and hopeful!”
“Deeper clarity around the path I’m charting for myself.”
What kinds of people are you most excited to connect with?
“People making art, living more analog lifestyles, or rethinking how to operate in our world without using traditional technology tools”
“open-minded people from different walks of life who want to reimagine ways of working, living, relating, creating, loving”
“People who care about making the world better, self development, and kindness! People who are authentic and creative.”
“People who love to devour knowledge, think, and share the best of what they find.”
“I made some of my absolute best friends at Third Nature last year - I’m just pumped for round 2!”
If the above resonates with you, you’ll love what we have in store for you at Third Nature Summer Camp 2025.
You can learn more and apply below:
Loved That
Here’s where I enjoy sharing some of the things that made me say (out loud or in my head), an enthusiastic, LOVE THAT, since I sent the last newsletter.
But there's another reason I do this: I believe "LOVED THAT" is a habit worth spreading. Taking the time to reflect on your week, savoring all the things you loved, is another form of gratitude practice that enhances happiness, fulfillment, optimism, and memory.
Do try this at home!
Anyway, here's mine from these last two weeks:
1. My brother-in-law Aaron’s Yahrzeit. A Yahrzeit is the Jewish custom of commemorating the anniversary of a loved one's death - Alexis’ brother Aaron died on July 31st of last year.
I didn’t write a newsletter the Monday after that either.
Being with Alexis and her parents these last 3 weeks, I saw that the Yahrzeit was a day no one was looking forward to. But listening to our wise rabbi’s words about the connection between the spiritual world and the real world, being surrounded by close friends and family, and playing music back at the house on one of the most beautiful weather days we’ve had here, ended up being so healing.
Baby Drew literally bringing new life to the family has also helped to brighten everyone’s days 👶
2. A hike to Coolidge Reservation, with Alexis and I taking turns holding Drew in the wearable baby carrier. Coolidge is our favorite hidden gem in my in-laws’ neighborhood, and we loved introducing Drew to some of our favorite trees 🌳
3. Aviv’s lamb kabobs.
Alexis’ cousin Yael and her longtime partner Aviv came to stay with us for a few days, reliving our COVID experience when the four of us + our friend Zach lived together in this house for 4 months.
Aviv is probably the best chef that I know personally, and he really threw down Monday night - lamb kabobs with toasted pine nuts, caramelized onions, mint, parsley, and cumin, inside homemade pita with chopped salad, cabbage slaw, spicy peppers, grilled eggplant salad, onions, sumac, and green tahini 🤯 😋
4. Two nights of Phish at the Saratoga Performing Arts Center (aka, SPAC) 🎶
If you read my most popular LinkedIn post to date from a few weeks ago, and zoomed in closely on my PIE-dentity, you’ll know that I intentionally kept “Phish Phan” as part of my after-becoming-a-dad identity.
When Phish announced their summer tour dates and Alexis and I mapped out our summer, I circled these 7/26 and 7/27 shows as the two I could potentially get to.
I’m so overwhelmed with gratitude for everyone and everything that fell into place to allow this to happen.
Especially because Sunday night was the greatest show I’ve ever been to.
Yea, I said it.
It helped that:
a) I was on the lawn with one of my oldest camp friends (who I’ve been to around 50 Phish shows with) + one of my newer camp friends (who I run Experience Camps For The Adults with and have been to around 5 Phish shows with).
b) We got Tweezer Reprise 6 times, the jammiest Roses Are Free since the 90’s, a YEM that made me cry, and a Hood that gave me the permission I didn’t fully realize I needed to feel good.
Thanks for reading! You can always browse the archive of old but evergreen posts here.
Feel free to reply or comment with any thoughts or ideas that came up as you were reading - or things you’ve experienced recently that you LOVED.
Wishing you a great week ahead :)
With gratitude,
Brian